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Filomena Aug 2022
When I say you're adorable,
I mean I adore you.
And my wordplay is horrible,
But I'll try to write more for you.

When I say you're a cutie,
It's not just a fluke.
I don't use the word loosely,
I'm telling the truth.

Just a glance in your eyes
Wakes a primal desire
Like a ballad that flies
From a darkly tuned lyre

By your side I find comfort
In your arms is my home
Even if others scatter
Never leave me alone
Filomena Feb 2022
Life doesn't get me high anymore,
But unfortunately I'm still addicted.
Filomena Jan 2022
literary illiteracy
insignificance on a grand scale

endless extensions
of empty expressions

obfuscation to no avail
Epic Fail
Age
Filomena Nov 2018
Age
Every person I knew as a child will be taken away;
Every landmark destroyed or changed beyond recognition.
Soon enough even the memories will fade.
I see why so many people live through their children.
Filomena May 2023
I've recently been told
That music's for the bold
And performance represents
A simple flow of confidence

While I think that's good to know
I think there's more to music's glow
Cause when I put my pen to paper
I want me to be the shaper

I aspire to hone my craft
And not come off as over-daft
But my music is my art
Communication from the heart

And that calls consideration
Of musicians' motivation
Cause when you stand up on the stage
It's true the listener's the gauge

Of if your music is worthwhile
Or should be thrown into the pile
So overall it's just a balance
Of one's skill, but also talent

So at the ending of the day,
The final thing I'd like to say
is...

A is for Adam
Atoms are for art
I'll write like a free radical
But on stage I'll play the part
Filomena Jun 2023
You're my music
You're my cooling breeze
My song along the way...

You're my rose
My shade among the trees
My ***** bright as day...

You're my sunlight
You're my lunar guide
The hero of my play...

You're my love
I need you by my side
I've been too long away...

You're my universe
My everything
My night sky, gold and gray...

Though circumstances stand between
My love will not delay.
Filomena Oct 2020
hi. seems that
it's the shame

me as het ****:
"see this math"

the same ****
as this theme
This is an old one I never published.
I do anagrams when I get bored.
If there are enough from one string, I try to make a meaningful set.
Filomena Aug 2022
Ontological definition
Driven crazy with inquisition
Pondering the implication
When what I need is simplification
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 47.
Filomena May 2023
Did I have something you wanted?
Did our figures cast a spell?
Or did forces unaccounted
Make our turbid rivers swell?

Did you hear a warning ringing
Like the striking of a bell?
While I heard a dryad singing
From a shining wishing well?

Were the waves too much to manage?
Was the whistle's pitch too high?
Did the volume make you panic?
Did the brightness hurt your eyes?

When the burning of the spotlight
Fell upon us like a stage
Did the harshness of the drama
Feel restrictive like a cage?

*******
I want to understand it
Like a firefly, you vanish
But I love you all the same

No matter
Between our idle chatter
Were the whispered words "you had her"
Acantha is your name

Did you think "I don't deserve it"
When I called you by your name?
Did you feel like you're not worth it?
Like our hearts don't weigh the same?

Girl, you know I want to show you
All the love your heart deserves
Want to be the ground below you
When life overwhelms your nerves

I wish that you could hear me
And I wish my words got through
Cause you've done your share of fearing
Want to show you something new

Soon I hope that you'll believe it
That the world belongs to you
But for now I'll have to leave it
Cause there's nothing I can do

*******
I want to understand it
Like a firefly, you vanish
But I love you all the same

No matter
Between our idle chatter
Were the whispered words "you had her"
Acantha is your name

I sorrow for your pain
Acantha is your name

No knowing who's to blame
Acantha is your name

I love you all the same
Acantha is your name
A song
Filomena May 20
I wouldn't call myself a poet
But you make me dream like one
You're an angel, but you don't know it
But I know, 'cause you gleam like one

Some people may not seem to notice
But who cares what people say
The ones who really know you know this
And would never push you away

My Goddess gleaming
My tears are streaming
Please tell me that you understand
The fate that weaved us
Must never leave us
Please keep me here in Heaven's hand

Now life's a trail that keeps on going
As we walk it hand in hand
The winds of time are always blowing
On our footprints written in the sand

I know that fate's a current flowing
As we swim it side by side
Never stopping, never slowing
Till we're swallowed by the tide

My Goddess gleaming
My tears are streaming
Please tell me that you understand
The fate that weaved us
Must never leave us
Please keep me here in Heaven's hand

I guess I'd call myself a poet
My pencil proves this power true
But sitting here I'd never know it
'Cause none of my silly rhymes could ever compare to you
For E, My Love
Filomena May 2022
I have heard someone say
That I'll always be conic,
But I find, in a way,
That the thought is quite comic

As it's clear that my gains
Come by means of a tonic,
I'll eschew needless pains
'Cause my shape is iconic!

(Though I wish in my heart
That my words were ironic,
I have known from the start
That I'll always be conic)
Filomena Jul 2022
A piece of potential
Worth more than a life?
Yet ever essential
The needle and knife

Though you keep on sounding
The drum and the fife,
Our pushback compounding
Won't shy from your strife

Do you see mere utensils
In your daughter and wife?
No piece of potential's
Worth more than their life.
Filomena Apr 2022
Can't make me want to stay alive.
It's sisyphean if you try.
You can, however, make things worse--
Suggest a ride inside a hearse.

-- Before, that sentiment held true,
But that's before my meeting you!
With you I've found a taste of mirth
And more-- A motive on this Earth.
Filomena Dec 2023
Está frio o tempo
E está forte o vento
Mas o rosto está contento
Que não falta aquecimento

Porque na figura
No caminho pela rua
As botinhas são felpudas
Refletindo as doçuras

E maldosamente olha
As pessoas na recolha
Mas ela nunca está nervosa
E sempre porta-se garbosa

E a sua processão
Nessa grande multidão
Não precisa de permissão
E é doce a sua canção

Porque o amor e o amizade
Para ela são bastantes
E não há necessidade
Atentar ao desplante

E está frio o tempo
E está forte o vento
Mas o rosto está contento
Que não falta aquecimento
My first attempt at writing in Brazilian Portuguese.
If you speak Portuguese
and have a suggestion,
please let me know.
Original English:
https://hellopoetry.com/poem/4594310/the-fuzzy-boots/
Filomena Aug 2022
My feeling word is adjective.
My mood number is one to ten.
My goal was met, and now I get
To wonder when I'm free again.
I guess I'm unimaginative.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 38.
Filomena Mar 2021
On this one bit I will not yield:
When on a modern battlefield
Where not one thought can be concealed
As hidden things can be revealed

You Shouldn't Wield a Wooden Shield
Simple idea worked out over a few days.
Filomena Aug 2022
I hope it works out for you.
I hope your desires come through.
  As I'm lying in bed,
  The thoughts run through my head.
I guess thinking is all I can do.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 33.
Filomena Feb 2022
I like you a lot.
I'm glad that we met.
I'm always happy to see you...

I worry it's hard
to deal with my ****
and still want me to be near you...

I feel really lucky.
It seems so unlikely
you'd see me as endearing...

But like air on a flame
when you call me by name
my heart lifts at the hearing.
For someone special.
Filomena Aug 2022
I heard a babbler
Yelling in the wind
Inviting all
To be absolved of sin

He talked of God
And of His Holy Powers
At length, and captively
I heard for hours

But even after
Listening and thought
The Word I heard
To me,
Means close to Naught
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 3.
Filomena Aug 2022
Being or seeming?
At first I was scared.
I was timid.
I tried to please,
but got in trouble anyway.
But when the changes came,
I was empty.
What you see is the real me.
I was worried.
I hated my image, but I ruminated.
I did things that should have been unspeakable.
I felt guilty. I felt free.
But I was still looking for the real me.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 56.
Filomena Aug 2022
Other people deserve help.
This is because they are human.

The writer is also human,
But the implication is hard to accept.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 43.
Filomena May 4
I don't understand this.
You don't understand these.
The Cowboy is a city kid.
The City Kid is me.

I was nothing. Now I'm something.
Wish I wasn't. Woe is me.
Why should I be anything?
The pain will set me free.

Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!

They say it's always getting better,
but it's never good enough.
The window pane is getting wetter.
Dry it off and toughen up.

Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!
Blows to the head!

The sun was set, but now it's rising.
Raging fires have fallen low.
But wait till darkness comes reprising,
and blazing flames in flurries flow.

Blows to the head!
Filomena Aug 2022
I broke my fast this morning.
My will was broken fast.
What a waste of energy
To make what's spoken last.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 25.
Coffee is addictive,
especially if you can't sleep.
Filomena Apr 2022
Worthless, worthless, says the preacher
Self-important, self-taught teacher

Worthless, worthless, says the buyer
Yet your price was never higher

You get it cheap, and start to boast
And then leave nothing for the host

But emperors are like their clothes
Their what and whether no-one knows

You take their treasure in your hand
And feel your fist is full of sand

You search for some security
See things become, but never be

Why seek to run a perfect race,
If past the sun is only space?

Would you rather face the end?
Or live to chase the wind?
Late 2018 - April 2022
Filomena Jul 2023
I don't know what is happening
Between the piles of crap I see
The people chasing after me
With urgency that's maddening
Psych Ward Poetry
Set 4, Poem 4
Filomena Jan 2019
Hatred runs
through the Universe

like putrid Blood
through a festering Wound
I am late to work.
Filomena Mar 2023
Comprehensive yet incomprehensible
Representing the unrepresentable
Neither tangible nor intangible
Both realistic and somehow fanciful

I fear safety's endangerment
In trust of well-known strangers bent
On straightening my parity
I lie with all sincerity
Filomena Sep 2023
Contorted reports of important reviews
The people can't keep with the lead on the news
The lady betrayed us, her graces abused
By signage confided my mind is confused

Sincerest endearments by tears are replaced
The fears I loathed feeding now filling the space
Where fondness of bonding once dawned on my face
What's left is a rift of disgusting disgrace
Filomena Nov 2018
S.O.S.
we're in distress
require immediate assistance.

Come quick as you can
tell your captain, Old Man
and pardon my insistence.

We're sinking fast
our ship won't last
despite our best resistance.

But as long as she floats
get ready your boats
to salvage our existence.

C.Q.D.
please talk to me
as it is, we aren't left much persistence.
//In Morse shorthand, CQD meant "To all stations, Distress".
Filomena Nov 2018
I must efface
the heron vase
so it will never be replaced.
it might mean something, or not
idk figure it out
Composed while at work.
Filomena Nov 2018
I looked through a peephole
and I saw a pair's son.
They saw me roar.
what does it mean?
Composed at work, Oct. 2018?
Filomena May 2022
The recommendation tab's
Second invasion has
Beckoned a case of bad
Dreckish evasion paths
What does this mean?
Filomena Jan 2022
When I was little, I fell into the deep end of a swimming pool.
While I can't have been under for more than a few seconds,
it felt like hours before anyone reached out their hand.
A true story (to the best of my recollection)
Currently publishing some of my old, less traditional poetry
Filomena Apr 2022
My teacher says there are no Christian witches
My good friend says no lesbians go by he
My father says degenerates belong in ditches
I guess just be the way you want to be
Filomena Nov 2018
My mind is a prison.
I can read the sign, but it wasn't mentioned in the manual.
Just sigh and move on.
Filomena Feb 2021
Bipartisan Ecological Propositions lay Indignantly Dormant.
Filomena Apr 2022
Here, I live, but I'm not living
In this land of no forgiving
My existence is a burden
So I won't try to be a person

Mi loĝas, sed ne vivas
Kaj se eĉ la suno brilas
Bone pli, mi ne ekzistu
Do mi neniel insistu

Wie zu wuhne unne lewe
Unn zu keemols sei vergewe
Ich bin umringt vun die Gretze
Unn kann niemols daerfe schwetze
English, Esperanto, Pennsilvaanisch Deitsch
Filomena Mar 2022
Hope is dead
but head is dope

Hope I'm ready
tying rope

Universal
crying trope

Only worsens
trying to cope
Filomena Mar 2022
an evening in an envelope
a river set on fire
a pearl inside a cantaloupe
a pointy cubic tire

a vacuum full of pressure waves
a Buddha full of pride
a panda in the everglades
an ego set aside

a childhood dream is coming true
the Lord is coming back
I have a million here for you
inside a penny wrap
Filomena Aug 2022
I am a fire hazard.
You are a fire drill.
Please help me get it
Through my head:
I have a life to fill.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 26.
Filomena Dec 2020
We are Laura, Will and Larry.
We are willfully illiterate.
We are leery of reading.
We literally won't willingly learn to read literature.

Well, if law required we read, would we refuse?

Alright, whatever.
We won't really worry, will we?
Tongue twister / speaking exercise for distinguishing w, l and r.
Filomena Apr 2022
Roses are dead
And rabbits are stew
You say you're in heaven
I don't believe you

The roses and rabbits
Will dance on your grave
But hope in a habit
If it helps you behave
First poem of a pair.
Filomena Feb 2023
Imma Live Bishop Yours Truly
Filomena Jan 2022
My Body cannot Cry,
but my Soul Screams Eternally
Nov. 2018
It seems to be a common experience for pre/non-HRT trans women to feel like they *should* cry when they are upset, but are physically unable to.
Filomena Aug 2022
All machines are mechanical,
But I'm not a machine.

Socrates is mortal,
But he's not so smart anyway.

Mortality is universal,
And the universe is me.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 27.
Filomena Aug 2022
There are degrees of confinement,
And escape is not a crime.
But without a realignment,
I'm resigned to pantomime.
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 52.
Filomena Jul 2023
I wish things could've been different.
I wish I hadn't had my psychology turned inside out for others' convenience and personal religious convictions.
I wish I hadn't internalized those convictions and turned them against myself and others.
I wish the doubts that were planted in me didn't come back again and again like a destructive **** in the garden of my existence.
I wish I could convince myself once and for all that I'm allowed to just be.

But here I am. I might as well try.
Filomena Aug 2022
Fight Risk
Flight Risk

Sight Quick
Fright Quick

Spite Freak
Alight Freak

Height Peak
Insight Peak
Psych ward poetry.
Set 3, poem 22.
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