I’m writing to you from the heart of L.A.
Because my healing process
Just isn’t going the way
I imagined.
I’m having trouble, you see,
With shedding this body, of me,
Because I can still see the imprints of your kisses
And feel the soft dance of your fingertips
Across my skin.
I try to do anything random
To make me happy;
Driving through neighborhoods in Rosemead,
Having my chakras aligned at a random sound bath therapy,
Driving to Long Beach just to write by the sea,
Picking lemons and oranges from the citrus trees
Within my favorite park,
Because when I pour their juices over my broken heart,
The sting brings a feeling, or a memory,
That only you could ignite in me after dark.
Everything I do, I do with the thought of you
And that’s strange for me to admit because
Even after all the California earthquakes you shifted
My grounds to,
And all the pink noise I try to drown thoughts of you out to;
Like driving late at night down Sunset and Vine
While my brother talks to me
About his favorite rapper’s documentary
But I’m only half listening
Because I’m too distracted
About what I’ve just learned about Van Gogh,
He only ever sold one painting in his lifetime
So you can imagine how emotional I get each time
I question why, why I do this
Why I try,
When nobody reads these melancholic thoughts of mine.
However throughout all of this,
There’s one thought that won’t run away from me;
It only talks about how much
I love you

M.H. John

Can we please talk about how we met
On those desolate white walls
Filled with whispered words and quiet secrets
Standing at a distance
Watching each other as if in a trance
Your eyes a daring temptation
That I gladly welcomed
I seized the moment
Took love by the horns
No fear of the pain that comes with a bull’s strength
Who knew the aftermath would be this grave?
My heart a tombstone of our love
Engraved, ‘Here lies the love of Rose and Star’
Its chambers a graveyard of forgotten souls
Just like how you buried me six feet under
Out of reach
An arm’s distance
Yet it feels like a million miles away
Is there something I should have said?
Were there words left unspoken?
Be realistic people’s words ringing in my ears
Our friends and families losing faith
Yet I still hold on to the promise of tomorrow
They weren’t there when our hearts joined and our souls entwined
I want to lose hope and let you go
Maybe my longing won’t be this much
I never wanted ours
To be a tale of betrayed love

She left his heart roaming with no regards
And her cold farewell cut deep into his core.
He loved her in full yet reaped a deck of shards
That spelt out a broken heart, nothing more.
His friends see weakness in his tender state
And their words like spicules spike his sleepy soul.
With a smile, he masks his wounds that seal his fate
But has lost his circle and has been left less whole.
The world casts stones at his every move
Unseen the scars that mar his every thought.
They judge in haste his broken groove
Not knowing it is the hurt that life has brought.
He walks on a lonely bridge beneath the moon’s pale night
And his heart, like a ship adrift at sea, is seeking for a new light.

I saw the time in your eyes,
that had me pause my breath like a stopwatch,
As if the feelings were a crime, that had
me caught out with what all it had got.
Cos when love had robbed my heart;
I grew impatient to go and call the cops.

Or was it me being impaired,
to humbly assume we could have made a perfect pair?
For the chorus of kisses subtly convinced every troubled
thought, dancing carelessly on top of my hair.
I could have been trying to force fit a puzzle piece, but it
only cuts me into pieces, realizing it was all a jigsaw.
And to nobody’s own prediction, “a shoot your shot
moment,” could prove to be so lethal.

Three stanzas; a standard for a quick understanding;
Accepting what’s current; a love of passion quickly
turning out so passive— a casual happening.
A cold turn, in the direction of a quicken head,
turning to have a glimpse of you as much.
But for this time, after having the taste of another broken
heart, I’ll put a stop to that broken stopwatch.

I watched sunsets with you,
But, never us seeing sunrises together.

I asked her out on a date,
Never thought I would get any hate,
Turned around to look at the clock,
Never expected I would get blocked.

In such pain I am now,
Never did I contemplate this to be,
It wouldn't matter if I died now,
Because you're here to set me free.

my heart soars in the clouds
but i fear it is icarus
and it’s beating will cease
before it melts and falls to the ground

for it only soared because of her
and any flight my heart had before
ended in a crash

never before has my heart hit the clouds
maybe the tops of trees
but any fall leaves marks

and a fall for her
would end in death

Oh Happy Day
What a very Happy  day
Now, how many laps do I have to take
And how many acts could I actually save
til I one day savor it
Here, take your HATE you can cradle it
Ive been an angel of patience
still stuck in prayer
Theyll say
she is so much safer
without the danger there
waiting to break
her
Pain is simply in her nature