You are
The poison in my apple
The cancer in my flesh
The decay in my soul.

So I will let you go
Release you
Into the ether and beyond

I’ll let the universe deal with you
You little blight
On my soul.
Begone.
Begone.

You put it there
Mother, Father,
And so I must endure it all.

Come
Follow me
We will walk
Down
The
Shadowy corridors
Of my heart
Stop
Right here.
and listen
To the sad litttle beat
Of my heart.
Just
Listen. It’s a beat,  a whisper,
then a hollow thump.
Oh my
My poor, wizened,
broken heart.

It’s my memory
so I guess no one would understand
what that gesture
meant
to me.

All those years ago.
1975?
The prairies.
Grandpa and Grandma’s house
We congregated
Kids left to their own devices but sometimes
Grandpa would walk us to the park and sit with us in the knee-high grass.
We’d talk and play and he would say-go pick  those yellow flowers
I will pick them too
and bring them back to  me.

I did. I was so intrigued. The rest ran off to play

I dutifully brought my bounty back to him.
He took those dandelions
And braided them into a crown
and put them gently on my head and said, you are a princess now.

He said I could be a princess
For just a moment
With a smile and a lot of love he made me a princess for just a
Moment
In time.

And for that, Grandpa,
I’ll always be grateful.

I miss you

I hear you
Even when you don’t want me to.
It’s ok to lament.  To
Feel
Everything.
It’s ok to do that.
If you’re feeling lonely,
I can do that with you.
You’re not alone
Don’t be alone anymore.
Here I am.
Here I am.

Pansies

Five velvet petals
so soft to the touch.
They come
In a plethora of colours
Colours of hope but
They always have a dark center.  Pansies are so
Fragile .
Resilient.
These delicate little flowers are so
Like me.

This warmth surrounds me
because you are near and so
dear to my wizened heart.