how does one go about expressing their love to a girl?
I've never felt like this about a girl, before
but everything - my heart, pounding and vulnerable and so impossibly fragile - now seems to depend on
her.
her laughter is like the colour yellow
and it turns my vision hazy every time
the expression she wears is innocent and unassuming
but those hazel eyes are white-hot fire
she's got this rosewood hair that floats around her, ethereal,
her hands are gentle, delicate
her heart is so full of love
her arms, filled with kidness
she turns the blood in my veins to crackling flames.
look at her mouth.
what can I say. how can I vocalize this kind of want. this kind of hunger.



I'd never tell. no, I'd never say a word.

the stench of ***** corrodes my nostrils
my battle wounds are scratchy and scabbed and
concealed.
raw fingertips; dry, muti-layered, pink and
un-uniform
heavy brain. aching, maimed.
chai tea sips, warm and pure and not a threat
of weight gain.

I see Myself in the upside down and
walk over to her, in the dark, ageless emptiness.
part of me feels that the right thing to do is hold
her hand, but another part of me wants her
to hurt, to cry, to bleed, to improve.
I don't know how to end this sonnet.

every time you touch me
microscopic gunpowder explosions materialize
all over my defenseless body
balled up in my chest and spread over the surface of my skin
jittering like static shocks through my stomach and legs
i'm pulled toward you by a force so painfully strong
my face toward yours
my body toward your body
that my mind needs to tighten the reign it has on my mustang heart




                                                  i wonder what my touch does to you?

The train is bright and empty
And it should be lonely, sitting here, hurtling through darkness, but I
Am in no state for people.
I am too far away.
Something is new in me.
Something is starting.
I move through the world every day
And I love it all, I do,
Love it to distraction, love it painfully, even
But
Distantly.
There is always something thin but impenetrable
Between me and all that I want to touch
To hold
To let crawl inside me and expand
So that maybe I'd be vast enough to hold this soul.
But tonight
That veil has peeled away-
No, it has fallen away
Like a sheet of fine silk, and I am
Raw
And new
And blinking in the light and everything
Is so saturated with color
And music
Thrums beneath the grinding of the rails.
It has been so long since everything could touch me.
I sit here and soak it in, a lover who has found everything to love
All of a sudden
And can do nothing but gaze.
All this
All this from someone,
And this is why
I just can't quit love.
This is why I try over and over,
Why I stay up nights wandering the darkened streets,
Why the hunger in my chest is something I treasure so excruciatingly.
Because the world is waiting
For you to find a reason to touch it,
And tonight I want my fingers to find every sidewalk crack and blade of grass,
Seek them like the skin of a lover in the dark- that gentle and that urgent-
And fill them all with silver light
And watch the world catch fire with what lives beneath my skin-
What lives here and has been sleeping
But is now suddenly, terrifyingly, gloriously
Awake.

How silly of me
Everything I'd ever wanted
Staring me in the face
And I chose to turn away.

So sensitive
And sentimental
You touch my heart
With all that you are

I once felt hopeless
The way you look at me
Leaves me breathless

As I write this
I understand
That no words can give justice
To what is happening between us right now

As a man of words
You leave me speechless
And yet our connection says more than any that have come before

I realize now that I have been lost for years
And I finally feel like I have found my way back home
Your light guided me to somewhere safe
A place I can call my own

Whatever fire I've walked through
Which led me to this
This point in time and place
To you
Was more than worth it
You were the passion I've been searching for