Your words
Stick like dried glue
Held in my head,
I felt your hands without ever touching them

I miss the vision of what those words
Led me to believe
About you,
And the way your eyes matched with forest green

We talked briefly,
But a lifetime was told
Like an infinite book written with no pages

Your words stay as a reminder, though
Of the notes between the lines
Encased in a deep well within,
Where the water permeates my soul
And never dissolves the feeling shared in that moment

An empty swing hangs from a tree
Drifting in airs varying touch
Vacant in his mind,
Where light shines upon the grass,
Stretching and leading
While shadows kiss the base of it's warm bark
This tree has a memory,
As the swing longs in its drift

This place
Where she used to reside,
Radiating magic and captivating flowers,
Remains dormant

The swing longs,
The tree mourns
The light, slightly dimmed and muddled

While remnants of her enchantment
Leave the scent of life and beauty embedded in every space
Her words once touched

each new day
is an opportunity
to do better
than the day before

challenge accepted

growth happens slowly
but i will cherish
each and every
new piece of myself
that i may
finally take the time
to know

To want to learn how become comfortable with who it is
that you are.. within your own skin, is the  firstfruit  beginnings
that will lead into the healing and resolve of your  inability
to be alone, and the overwhelming need of your  current
emptiness to have its debilitating loneliness filled in ways  
that in the long run, bring about more harm into your world
than good.

What I brought to you involves the less traveled road  that leads
into true healing and resolve of this primary and current
issue of yours..  
    but at this point, that is not what you want.
The emptiness  you will now have filled in your own current way,
   but it will come at such a cost.
You were built to become healed into the fullness
of who it is that you are..
and the comfort within your own skin
that fullness will bring to you..
and therefore to your whole household.

That process takes time.
It is difficult and uncomfortable.
It takes trust and the desire to truly love yourself.

I did not lie to you.

You can start again with a different supportive,
loving friend..

if you are fortunate enough to find one.



I hope for you that you do.  
xox

a soul history is like the caligraphy of dunes
the psyche toiling its dark materials
sketching shadows from imagination
the cabaret of desire contemplating all the wonderful trivial terrible beings you can be. a wave in my mind you are
between the visible and invisible man the wisdom of the shamans

I walk on streets, I see things, I touch hands suffering from imagination deficit disorder. sometimes I have thoughts in reverse
but I cage my heart in this shrine of memory while
I am looking for you dawn by dawn, bird by bird

It’s time
I’ve been activated
Systems coming online
Nerves buzzing
Electric fingernails
Prickle the scalp

This morning
Was the last of its kind
The wheel of change turns
Revealing a strange  new dawn
Nothing will ever
Be The same

i dream of
an awkward
first kiss
that starts
at my forehead
and gravitates
to my lips

i can see
a shared smile
and hear
a childish
chuckle
echoing between us
as we say
“**** the universe”
and we throw away
all the past things
we’d rehearsed
because, let’s face it
the us we’ve been
has been cursed
and the world around us
has been pointing
to
so many signs
trying to lead us
to each other
but somehow
we’ve still never touched
never kissed
never licked
never ******
maybe deep down
we know it’d
be too much
and we’d both
just melt
into puddles
and remain
as mush

but whenever
i tell my heart
to hush
it talks back
all sassy
like a teen girl
to her mother
saying “idgaf”
and like
girl, i get it
i am it
i live it
but
what
the
****?

why do i try
and then run
out of luck?

*******
hockey puck

something
something

i’m a frog
and i am
too afraid
to strut my stuff