all this time
i tried to give you an excuse.
i tried to lie to myself
that you're just hurting too,
and you're trying your best.
i tell others you're a great mother to me,
and how lucky i am to have someone like you.
i mention how strong you are and how you're the strongest person i know.
i lie and i lie and i lie.
so that i don't have to face the reality
that you don't actually love me.
you see me as a stranger and want me out of your home.
you don't believe in me,
and i am no daughter to you.
how cruel a mother can be,
but you were never a mother to me.
i didn't grow up with a mother's love.
and even without a mother figure in my life,
i know **** well i won't be the kind of mother you were to me.
and i'll make sure my children don't grow up second guessing their mother's love,
like how i did with you.