Blocked, caged in, suffocating smothered in pain
significant other feeling abandoned while in your presence
in your mental you're going insane
no love lost, because no love gained! thought after thought
living, but stuck in the past
show no emotions-because having emotions is what got you here
Finding a way back to the old you seems a far.
such a long distance from you
you know, the you that smiled alot whose face was once full of light
The you that cared and actually enjoyed caring
Soon those Deep Thoughts will make you realize what it is that you do
you make everyone feel lonely while connected to you.

I'm so successful
In their minds
I can function
I am bright
I smile
I laugh
I'm capable
I'm eloquent
I'm responsible
I have a good job
I'm quite skilled at it too
I've got impressive grades
I'm steps ahead in school
I'll have a high-paying career
I've got it all together
I've perfected "success"

but

I'm not happy
I want to cry
I want to rip my heart out of my chest
I desire to make myself weak
I don't want to care for myself
I don't have friends
I don't have support
I'm utterly alone
I'm suffering terribly
I can't keep my thoughts straight
I struggle to keep the darkness at bay
I'm in ruins

I guess that's success.

You called me "gifted"
You forced an identity on me
If I wasn't smart, who was I?
I knew I would let you down
You taught me to box myself in
So I could take over when you left
And now here I am
No better than anyone else
Utterly lost and confused
I don't know who the hell I am
Because everything that made me
What you told me I was
I had to abandon
Because it was killing me
All those "gifts" that now I see
Were the result of nothing more
Than my ******* anxiety