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Lydia, Lydia,
There are broken angels
beneath your skin.

Your face is stone,
and white as snow,
where the color should have been.

Your husband is by your side,
middle school passion left undead.
Your sister over your right shoulder,
smiling like the day you wed.

You don't hear Zach's talk of cereals,
but a tight smile shows on your face.
The greif streaked grime of tears and salt
rims your neck like wedding lace.

Tomorrow you will rise
and pour milk into your bowl.
Look across the table,
just to feel your crushing soul.

To not see the eyes
that were there for twenty years.
To share no more secrets,
or confide her sisterly fears.

You both spent your life devoted
to three hundred sixty-five words
of repiticious hope.
Only to wake up with the flipping of a page,
to find a car bent in ash and smoke.

This hollow eyed shell I saw in the store
clenched her teeth up tight,
to suffer along like the people of The Book,
and hold Faith to Father of Light.

You made me shed tears for you,
Madison,
because you made me come to see
I would never leave my little sister
By any of my own means.

I felt cheated for you,
so joyous in your Word.
To spread the light of God
to every part of Earth.

But now you are away,
taking flight,
still this young.
I go home with knotted throat,
and my eyes felling as if theyd been stung.

I've been thinking of you both,
Sisters,
by blood and faith.
I'm so sorry for your loss,
the unknowing,
all the rage.

I weep for you, dear Madison.
You lived only in a blink.
But I weep for you still more, Lydia.
And I pray that you won't sink.
A passing of the eldest sister in our home town this week, her sister having been a classmate. A devestation, to say the least.
Liz Apr 2015
keep me in mind
when I am hidden.
when I keep myself away,
from the burning light of day.  

It's burnt away my nerves,
I can't feel a thing.
Numb to the world,
but feeling in the cold.

I've said it a thousand times,
I'll say it a thousand more.
I'm not the type to laugh,
I'll always shut the door.

So the cold is where I stay,
I can't sleep when it's warm.
I feel myself on fire,
always starting a new war.

Oh sunshine,
please die.
stop mocking my frostbite,
stop torching all desire.

Why won't you listen?
have you no ears?
I've been this way since birth,
I'll be this way for years.

I told you I'm not human.
I'm not the way I should be.
the tundra behind my bedroom door,
it's swallowed me.

Please don't forget about me.
I'm dying to leave.
I'm dying for someone to reach out,
instead I'm dying from greif.

Let's build a fire,
not the kind that kills.
But to melt the ice,
that's been holding me against my will.

Rather, just let me burn.
I'll turn to dust,
I'll drift away,
It's all a deadly lust.

Don't let me run,
tie me tight.
I need the fire,
but I think I might die.
Erica Jane Kay  Oct 2010
Greif
Erica Jane Kay Oct 2010
The tears running down my face
I don't understand
The things you do
Why you do them
What goes through your head
While all this is happening
I cant even think straight
My life now
Is me stairing at a wall
Blankly
Consumed by sadness
That you selflessly piled on to me
written 11/17/09
Heather Moon Jun 2023
Greif has
Clawed at my insides
for many years now
Greif like a river
I could choose to tear at the shoreline as the current dragged me
Or I could surrender into unknown currents
Allow it to take me
And so I fell in
And it brought me on quite the journey
I was broken open
I let go of who I was
And I grieved who I was before
And I grieved
Like a river song
Which needed to journey
With no inhibitions
No ego games
No fear for being
Raw
I feel that greif will always be with me
An old friend waiting silently at the gate
I've learned
It has just been a journey of love all along
love and greif
Are of the same source
They are of the same river
To greive is to love
To love is to grieve
A deep bow to those
Who have allowed greif and love
to etch itself into you, to dance
Through you
Reminding me at a time when I needed it that I am allowed to be
That I am safe to surrender.
Lorraine day Jul 2013
I look in the mirror at my vacant stare
But I can't see me I'm no longer there
My body is numb my mind frozen in time
What has happened to this heart of mine

I pick up the pieces it's what they'll expect
Put on a brave face its what I must project
So many people not knowing what to say
Most when they see me turn the other way

I ask myself this question how do I carry on
I'm damaged and broken the old me has gone
I watch television but can't take it in
I try to read a book then throw it in the bin
I pick up my paint brush trying to paint a scene
But I can't it's not there.  I just want to scream

Ten years have now passed
Its took that long to find
The inspiration to write again from a clear heart and mind
I still look in the mirror griefs taken its toll
But my heart is no longer lost with my soul
your beard doth have

a villainous nature I think

one that would for want of mischief

whisper uncertainties

into a grieving ear

as such would cause

a flailing of tongues

and extract dire extremities

from a grief stricken father

who through an acid mist of tears

would summon a pale horse

to seek a blank claim for revenge

that would magnify

existing greif a thousand fold

such is the nature of your

villainous beard

begone I say from

this house of sorrow

or it shall be you

who in a box shall lay

without grief to borrow

you villainous beard

begone I say
Jinx Sep 2013
Nice to know your life is great as you throw me to the side.
Youve taken down all my pictures like I'm something to hide.
Nothing I ever do is good enough for you.
Now I sit here emotionless unsure what to do.
Bad enough I don't have one parent but now your both gone?
What did I do that was so ******* wrong?

Is it because your new husband doesn't like the way I am?
Is that why all of a sudden you don't give a ****?
Am I no longer good enough to be your kid?
Sorry but being me isn't something you can forbid.

Ill keep to my loud music and my dark clothing taste.
Ill pretend everythings fine while behind my back you whisper to everyone I'm a disgrace.
Disgrace of a human.
Dropped out of school so I'm also a disgrace as a student.

Failure to stay locked up in my room wasting away.
Failure to hold my tongue instead I say what I have to say.
Failure to a trophy mother.
All because I wasn't your perfect trophy daughter

These words keep echoing in my head!
Bouncing around for years making me wish I was dead!
I've taken care of myself my entire life.
19 years of pain, greif, and strife.

19 years all alone.
19 years and I'm still not fully grown.
19 years I've fought to survive.
19 years and I'm just starting to grow tired from how much I strive.

I'm sorry I'm not what you wanted me to be.
I'm sorry I didn't listen and just did me.
I'm not sorry for what I'm about to say.
That I'm cutting you out of my life so just go away.
Never had a mother in the first place so why does it matter?
But I won't be there when your world is about to fall around you and simply shatter.....

So don't bother to lie and say I'm wrong and your right like you always do.
Take this as me pretty much saying I Hate You...
William Keech  Jun 2015
abuse
William Keech Jun 2015
I hate you
I can't stand you
I hope I'm never like you
You killed us
You beat us
You broke us
It took years to repair
All the damage that you caused
You never can recall
All the anger you
Displayed
While the tears ran down
Our faces
We had to learn to lie
To hide from all the pain
To keep you safe
Because you were supposed
To be our protector
You were supposed to be a father
An now matter how
Much you hurt us
We still loved you
We still took up for you
When the world turned
It's back on you
We tried our hardest
But it was never good enough
We always just a little less
Than the perfection
That you wanted
So you drowned us in a bottle
And all of your sorrow
Then we finally good see
All the greif an pain you
Caused us
We stood up to you
An you hated us
Threw us out
An we swear we would never
Be you I swore I'd never hurt
Anyone like you always seemed too.
Now that I am older
I can forgive you
But I'll never forget
The pain I saw every time
On my mother's face when
You hit her
An I'll never forget
The effect you had on me
Or the pain you afflicted on our family.
Camz Kho May 2014
I need the sunsets,
purple and orange
and angry for having to leave.
I need the ocean,
blue and aqua
and enraged by a storm.
I need the wind,
swift and cool
and tearing trees from their roots.
I need the fire,
warm and comforting
and turning everything to ashes.
I need the land,
strong and sure,
and temperamental with its shaking.
I need the feeling,
of love and contentment
and lust and heat
and pain and strength.
Oh to want
both the anger
and the happiness,
the love
and the hate,
the softness
and the pain.
And to wish to want
naught more
than what you give me
But to always want more
than what i have.
The greif there is
in contradiction, and
the hurt there is
in not being enough.
But to want more
is to be human, and
it is in being human
that we love.
So i will take
what it is you give, and
hope and pray
i will want
naught more than you.
i was inspired by the saying "there are two sides to every coin". and it's true. you cannot love, which is a perfect thing, without being human and imperfect. and you cannot say you have loved if you do not love both the dark and the light in a person.
Louise Johnson  Aug 2011
Journey
Louise Johnson Aug 2011
The beginning is a vicious start.
Of tears of joy and an open heart.
But we are fighting the inevitable,
As the fear of death can be incredible.
we will always be judged by our beauty
as people feel like it's their duty
to speak about us in horrible ways
do they not know that the sadness stays..

but although life can give you greif
you've got to go on with the belief
that through life you will learn from failing
and life is an ocean that you are sailing.
Sail it well as you've got one chance
live it like it's your last dance.
EgoFeeder May 2013
These lost years of loneliness and social depravity
Have left me with nothing except this written tragedy
I sat and watched as the walls of my life crumbled away
Into this contorted sensation twisting through dismay
These ceaseless rememberance sessions screaming inside
A dead fixed stare on old friends taking cyanide

These bonds have come together in such a swift motion
And, just as fast they've came to their abrubt destruction
Dispersing any tint of mutual belonging from view
Molding a sad landscape of sighs and failing virtue
Watching as the remnants of my relationships loiter
The catacombs of these stockpiled confession letters

If only I could say anything my empathy had to tell me
My skeletal pose might have perched upright in a higher degree
And I would of have grown to a more formidable size
A clear cut aspiration that I never came to realize
Until all that I held grew too big for me to carry
and left me to stumble and sleep at the cemetary

Scratching dead love songs on century old gravestones
Where the forgotten have slept for generations alone
Hoping the crude penmanship might grace a weary heart
Or help a looming ghost feel a taste of love and depart
From the fog filled graveyard parade that it dwells
A final ringing from the synapsis of the greif bells

Sparking the ruin of a memory that doesn't seem real
A fading echo of a brotherhood I wish I could still feel
Detached from a reality that lurks in a decrepit imagery
Reshaping my empty cognition through a fake neuro surgery
I've reached the point where I have no reason to find
A replacement for all these buried pictures astray in my mind
Raghiba batool Jun 2014
The cries of death cannot haunt me,
as I have heard the voices of silence
The darkness of grave cannot scare me ,
as I have seen the darkness of minds
The redness of blood cannot make me tremble,
as I have seen the colors of hatred
The fast moving wind cannot make me shiver,
as I have already swallowed the flood of emotions
The depth of sea cannot challenge me,
as I have already shown it the depth of my eyes
The lonliness of the way cannot make me afraid,
as I have already left my destination behind.....

— The End —