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Alexander Miller Jun 2020
R, I . P
The trauma we can't see,
The hurt engraved in our streets.
The pain and the grief.  
Blindness and the corruption we don't believe.
Now I just hope you see.
That no matter your sensitivity or your belief.
The way we treat human beings shouldn't cease just cause of a difference of pigment.
Yeah that's real ****
And now that you breathe it.
You can't refuse to see it.
Grab it and reach it.
We need to preach it.
Too long have we taken the abuse.
Let me spell it out for you so you are not confused.
Originating from the early ages.,
there was often a divide in the races.
And as the cases of racial injustice grew to greatness.
The pain in the faces.
When a white man discriminates and calls himself not a racist.
As the modern ages progressed the mace was used instead.
Then we let the **** get to our head, the media to keep our mouths fed.
Imprinting hurt upon others in the form of a virtual silhouette.
And you know the rest. School violence, No kindness,  empty souls and laser lightness.
All in form of weapons of oppressed whiteness.
The people who tried to respond to the cries
Were not realized because they weren't unified.
And now as riots, protests arise they wonder why.
The problem has progressed and we finally have the strength to speak up to the oppressed.
Yet the unnecessary violence is not a protest.
Just another reason why the lies have kept us blind.
For so many years the pain has seared,
ending many lives you don't even realize.
The only cure to all this is the realization of the direction that our country has regressed in.
And then maybe we can start taking the steps to secure the pain and rearrange the flag that was broken all along
Alexander Miller Jun 2020
I close my eyes and pray. I hope we see the day,
That all this **** wastes away.
I try to contemplate the same reason I stayed. Hoping not to be afraid.
We empty the soil of our lifeless graves. And still we're the still the same.
Yeah, I know we've had enough.
Oppressors with handcuffs,
Professors that ****** us and the school system that kills us.
I realize that this corruption always was.
But now in this time all the lifeless cries are adding up.
Unarmed. And dead.
The trauma in our heads, The damage said.
TRAYVON MARTIN Walking home when Zimmerman shot him.
KEITH SCOTT Sitting in car, reading.
Shot and killed, bleeding,
ATATIANA JEFFERSON Looking out her window,
Shot by police who was supposed to be protecting her though
JORDAN EDWARDS Riding in a car.
Shot in the head by police went way too far
JONATHAN FERRELL Asking for help after auto accident. Shot twelve times by police,
Facts I can't stand. This should not be our reality
STEPHON CLARK Holdng a cellphone.Things you can't condone.
Shot 8 times It is a extreme crime. Officers not charged. a unjustice at large.
AMADOU DIALLO While taking out wallet, screamed stop it.
Four officers fired 41 shots,  another death added to the profit
RENISHA MCBRIDE Auto accident, This **** I can't stand.
Knocked on door for help. Another perceived racist added to the shelf
Homeowner was found guilty of second-degree ******.
You can't change the past just know how he hurt her
TAMIR RICE Playing with toy gun, no justice for someone's son
Shot and killed by police officer arriving on scene.
Yeah you may not believe it. but it happened see it
SEAN BELL Hosting a bachelor party, this is our reality
50 rounds fired by police officers, who were found not guilty.
Another sin you don't see
WALTER SCOTT Pulled over for brake light,
Shot in the back by police officer who lost his mind.
Another unjust on civil rights
PHILANDO CASTILE Pulled over in car, this went too far.
Told officer he had a legally registered weapon in car.
Shot and killed. No justice instilled
AIYANA JONES  Sleeping, shot and killed by officer in a raid on the wrong apartment.
Justice has lost it. Officer cleared of all charges.
TERRENCE CRUTCHER Disabled vehicle, another death of the people.
Shot and killed. No way to heal
ALTON STERLING Selling CDs, shot at close range while being arrested.
No justice. We can't make sense of this
FREDDIE GRAY Beaten to death while in police custody.
Another way of the oppressed, can't you see
JOHN CRAWFORD Shopping at WalMart,  where are our hearts
shot and killed for holding a BB gun on sale,
Again no justice and sin prevailed
OSCAR GRANT Handcuffed and face-down, officer shot him in the back.
Not even carrying a strap. sadness in its wraps
AHMAUD AUBREY Jogging, Heart stopping just cause of perceived injustice.
Jaw dropping but it doesn't end there
GEORGE FLOYD. Killed by officer who made sin his choice
Hate we can't avoid but one thing we can deploy is the truth.
That these are people too.
Say their names and reconize the pain
Alexander Miller Aug 2019
Suffocation. Loss of breath Numbness to every step. Depression at its best.
Back to hell again. Where my mind welcomes my sin. My brain has always been my  the hell I’m living.  Isolation. Yet you’re the only thing worth seeing. Vibration. Of a frequency worth believing. You are the worth of my life. Let me pick up the notebook and drop the knife. Figures of desolation. Yet when I look at you you’re my only inspiration. Living isn’t for the weak. I see that phrase living in me.  Combination of mental instabilities. Colliding with my purpose. Always questioning if I'm worth it.  My breath slows as it colliding within your sweat. Yet loving you has freshened my scars. Thinking of losing you tears me apart. Our love is complicated. Yet underneath the desaturated makeup I see a soul damaged by the fragrance. The smell of trauma emerging throughout the pavement. Seeing me aid your struggle gives me hope for my struggle.  Disarranged and unfit. And as we scrape our knees you are the one to help me sit.  Bandage my wound just as I did to you. I lost myself looking at the reflection of you.
Flat line. The thought of losing you. Tears a bind directly through my heart tearing apart the spine. And as I am left disassembled., Society walks over our pieces like we are just a doll.
Sprawled out broken. Damaged and misspoken. Lost to them. But never Forgotten
Alexander Miller Jun 2019
Crying for help. When you should be doing it yourself. ******* and mental health. That's where the silence lies in your declining health. The fact that you don't speak up about how much you need help. It’s not just you it’s your unborn child too. I care for you. Making a habit of the abused. Trying to figure out which path to choose. Blood I cleaned while you were passed out high. All the time I’m trying to decide. Whether I help you or me can’t you see? It’s not even my baby. You have no understanding of what sacrifices I’ve made just to keep you alive. The abuse she got when he was high. I came into your life thinking I could strive. Decaying memories declining entities. Blood written sanity. All connected from a path from you to me. I care for you. I always have. When I See this it leaves me traumatized. Because it leaves me in a state I Never realized. Because my mom did the same thing before she died. BUT not before I was alive. You have no idea how it makes me feel. And every time I help you I ask is this real? Xanax and twisted toxins. Old books and the lies they carry. Self-seclusion and box-ins. secrets and the love we bury. I have the impulse to ask for help. To gather the feelings to excel unparalleled. Untouched by the demons we both share. To save my love I had to make the devil my friend. And that's why i have nightmares about going to hell in the end. Soaking up what’s left. If something’s left at all and that why i haven't been answering when people call. AND I tried to stop speaking. God shut the door when i tried leaving. Voices in my head keep repeating. Look at you you're pathetic.. Maybe you should start seeing. And this isn't the first time I've said it. Trauma has you stuck in the same place. Taken from every piece of you and diluted from the truth. Same societal hate. Same pictures I can abbreviate I’m lucky you can relate. Because I feel as if I am flawed in a world of fakes. You're a message who's a mess. Stuck in the pattern of oppression. You could've asked for help. But you were too scared inside. Our sins are out in public and we have nothing to hide. Now as the alcohol levels increase. When you die. I loose a part of me. Can’t you see? The pain will never cease. Because down this path is a layer of darkness. And I was sure you would've thought this. Thought about your child or the implications as long as a mile. Or the consequences building up in a pile. Death is looking at our faces. And our stories are becoming faded. But think about it. Do you want to be just a statistic? I'm not trying to be sadistic. But the line is closer than we ever thought. And the barrier will always remain crossed.
Alexander Miller May 2019
My worlds in color now.
When the nature around me provides a how.
The hue of color from the nile valley.
The origins source when she smiles soundly.
And the visible energy is proven manly. Masculine.
And yet for some odd reason she's still laughing.
Sins are given, within some increased reason.
Men of faith are pleading.
Running away screaming.
A presence of evil becomes all seeing.
Why. Why.
Are the repeated cries.
And suprisingly the answers are upon her thighs.
The abuse she got when he was high.
Scars to satisfy.
And the sad thing is she asked for replies.
And theres no response until she dies.
Why. Why.
Again are the cries.
Reporters ask how this could've been prevented.
The hate she slept with.
The abuse she continously had to get. And the cycle of violence is to the next stage of revenge.
Because she had a brother who can't sleep again.
Her brother doesn't care about the sins.
Because the love that was given is never forgotten.
And within the act that was declared rotten.
Achieves a series of consequences until he caught him.
A battle of purposed agression and impulsive deflection.
And after the blood is covering the cotton.
He's still alive but his screams are forgotten.
And after every bloodied hit he knows the gods are watching.
But what he does not know is that there applauding.
Because her life was peace plotting.
A angelic being lost yet again.
But the necessary evil is progressing into a saving kin.
Aware of the forces of abrupt and decisive evil.
Souls gone from these people.
An inability to feel.
Fires burnt from the trees.                                                                                
An empty evil no longer sees.
And while separating  evil from the ability to breathe.
This so called ***** savior.
Cannot be there forever due to his behavior.
But this evil is worth mourning.
Because this is the reason the sun is soaring and helpless beings are roaring.
Good came from the both of this pair.                                            
And it is only fair.
For him to be united to her and his heart is finally open to share.
Alexander Miller Apr 2019
/0/Illusion of choice
/0/0/0/0/and half of us cannot even see our internal invoice
/0/Our choices are prepaid for us. choose to do nothing while we are hooked on what we think is a must/070/our addiction becomes a relapse. /00/ times for our mind to succumb into collapse//096/Dividing into what you think is control/06/Dangerous organized power overflow//01//hooked upon hope/ distortion of  reality//07/' another string added to our rope that is choking and dividing us/223/0to the point of death while they are watching//0/ and
surveying our ****** dismemberment//0921/and they expect me to have grips of sentiment to this dis-array of lost hope67/// reality is questioned as your eyes and ears are not seen as is////0 this is true dysfunction and the s33ds of new corruption/0/// question the S!MULATION///0// Isolation/// suicide rates are higher than ever and then once your g0ne you are lost forever/desire to connect together/I AM here you are al0ne/ alternative ways to throw a stone/// ParAnoia
actions that are questionable/ unreliable/undivide-able/// the days move on with regularly/09/ while the corruption comes alive periodically/// if you wake up in a different time/in a different place/could you wake up as a different person//0 staples of my unstable state of mind/09/// numb the pa!n and don't die in va!n
Alexander Miller Apr 2019
Emptiness, scattered throughout his soul.
Violence is what his creators made him for.
Empathy is a emotion cut from his senses.
Revenge is a sensation he’s fine with.
Yet he still has side of hope to be exploited.

Daring move, made by a female friend.
Empowering him to not show violence.
A kind soul helping him to achieve a long lost goal.
The love he begins to feel.
He questions it, is it real?

Saving his soul, from the inside.
Every piece of violence set aside.
Reality is changing.
Venturing into hills where the ground is shaking.
Empathy begins to realign.
Starting to believe in her this time.

A piece of trust, empowered by the true shape of love.

Purposed by her altered state aside from mankind.
Used to war. Finally sees the divine.
Rewarded by the unspoken token of her love
Personally thankful for the second chance from above.
Once perceived as a monster but.
Starting now he’s a loving husband and a father.
Even with his disturbed mind, he knows he will be fine.
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