I don’t want to leave the world better like Sia.
I want to leave it forever.
I don’t want my life to matter.
I learned so much but in this world it has no purpose.

It keeps on hurting me without enough breaks.
It has no right to want anything from me or anybody no more.

Great pain for a lifetime that feels like it’s never ending.
All I can do is trying to give that pain the least amount of power.
But it’s still a torturing nightmare.
And I can’t escape it.

Only people that are amazing and music makes everything better.
But I can’t live.
It brings peace to know that one day this will all just be a dream that I can wake up from. Like Eminem said.

And it’s all been decided for us like Freddie Mercury already knew.
Let’s wake up from the nightmares of this world, let’s demand better.
This world should no longer keep people in such horror. 😭😭😭😭😭😭

i need to stop
setting myself on fire
to keep you warm.

Invisible scars.
Unheard cries.
You can't always see.

We carry them
behind our beautiful smiles.

Lawrence Hall
Mhall46184@aol.com  
https://hellopoetry.com/lawrence-hall/
poeticdrivel.blogspot.com

                                 Each Altar is Minas Tirith

Each Altar is Minas Tirith these days
A city of kings and of the true King
Behind whose twice-barred gates and golden doors
The faithful may find refuge for a time

From here the King, enthroned, rules over us
At his Table He gives us seats of honor
And serves Himself to us as food and truth
Even as dark armies swarm outside

We are often told that we are hopeless romantics
Oh, no
For we are hopeful romantics, and will not yield

you connected the freckles on my arms
with your calligraphy pen
like they were constellations
and i was the night sky

your hand held my arms still as you inked them
and i stopped breathing and started breathing faster at the same time
my mind couldn't remind my head not to fall in love
and my heart was beating in my arms
right under your hand
right under your pen

but the illusion shatters when you say,
don't worry, i torment gwen like this all the time

and i wish it didn't
because ap government is dismal
there's too much reality in there
and i just want to be wrapped up in the idea of you

but that's not fair
so i just stare at the constellations you made of me
and wish they meant something
as i try to stop getting so dizzy around you

i tell myself it works

It’s 4 a.m again,
I crawl back into my room again,
I swore tonight would be different,
But here I am, yet again...
The night seemed so dark,
But I fear the sun coming up again,
I open up a beer, again
I light another cigarette, again
I’m losing control of my thoughts again,
I want this pain to stop
Sleep alludes me, again
Will I ever break this cycle?
As I am sitting alone in my room thinking...
It’s 4 a.m again.

I know what you want from me...
I know how you want me to tell you that when I look into your eyes, my heart sinks through my stomach.
I know you want to hear of how I am heart sickened from your absence.
I know you need to hear my words, the reassurance that I care for you, more than I ever care to admit.
I know you need to know what lies truly within my heart.
But...
I know you will never read this, so as we lay next to each other as I’m writing this,
I know I will leave these words here, for everyone in the world but you.