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bloodKl0tz Feb 2023
01 I am not asleep anymore
02 My body is moving underwater, slowly
03 The resistance of pushing each leg against the salt water
04   Warm and cold at the same time
05 It comes up to my knees and sloshes over thighs
06   Up to my thighs and splashes up over the waist
07 I venture further away from the dark shoreline where I awoke
08 I am not asleep anymore but I am cold
09 The pain of blood flow returning to my legs
10 My skin burnt from the sun and rough sand
11 The salt water stings everywhere
12 My heart is on fire
bloodKl0tz Feb 2022
It is raining, and I am in love.
I love the rain
   and I love myself.  
Your bed is hot and I am lying in it.  
The rain is warm and I am dancing in it.
Your touch radiates heat and I am curled in it..  
I am in love with my skin and my folded-over belly.  
It is raining.  
Your heart beat does not exist to keep mine alive and I remind myself of this as I listen to every soft sound made by your body.  
I am in love with my strength and all of the fear behind it.
It is raining.
And I am in love.
02.21.2014
bloodKl0tz May 2021
your fingertips are branding my skin, scorching bright dots white-hot across a swath of my naked back

blisters form before i can even feel the searing pain rake across the path of your hands
bloodKl0tz Jan 2021
A train sits idle
Driver turns off the headlights
Helps my night vision

Flying past cop car,
Headlights turn on in rear-view,
Turn off, I can breathe

Oncoming driver,
Flash my lights to warn them
Of deer or police

At small town train tracks
Car flashes brights at random,
Left me quite confused
bloodKl0tz Oct 2020
I want to die out here with you
I want to decompose in your arms
our flesh slowly growing softer, and softer as our skin rots and our organs decay
our bones slowly growing closer, and closer
until our leg bones are not separated by leg flesh and our hip bones are not separated by hip flesh and our hearts seep together over our rib cages and our skulls press together, chin to forehead
dry leaves tickle our feet and the cool wind soothes our hot bones and the earth covers our clasped hands
until they can no longer tell who was me and who was you
probably 2009ish
bloodKl0tz Oct 2020
1.  Headlights glowed like cigarette ends in the twilight

2. As soon as they winked out in the warm, weedy field, and the harsh engine noise snapped into silence, I began to cry.

3. Father stepped quietly towards me and I sniffed as I smelled the earth I was digging, the sweat I was dripping, the carcasses I was covering.

4.  Beneath the distant moon Father paused, watching me sift dirt over the remains of two limp goldfish.

5. The morbid scene glittered as moonlight sparkled off my tears and the half-buried scaled.

6.  A small tribute to their salty home.

7.  As if on cue, the wind ruffled the tops of the grain in the neighboring unshorn field; the undulating stalks mimicked the ocean.

8.  Their grave remains unmarked.
Written for Creative Writing class in 2008, the exercise was called Syntactic Gymnastics.
bloodKl0tz Sep 2020
My legs are heavier than I am used to,
Except it feels so familiar,
I think this happens every night when I try to run in my dreams,
And its like forcing each step forward through thick syrup
Hardening wet concrete
A rapidly thickening slurry coating me.

I am weighed down by it, down on my knees now, hoping that grabbing the ground and pulling myself forward will increase my momentum
Ripping out handfuls of grass trying to get the earth to treadmill beneath me
Clay under my nails, more slurry, more layers,

The earth is a part of my lungs now
Wet pink webbing hardening from the outside in
Thin tendrils brittle and breaking off, sun-dried,
Cracking and dusty and making its way up my throat
A river bed of mud consuming the space in my mouth,
I reach in with my fingers and scoop out the muck and throw it but it keeps coming,
Filling and refilling my mouth, faster than my fingers can dig it out
Thick like dentist's putty, coating my tongue and teeth like taffy

The fear is always there
The fear mixed with the drowning feeling, drowning in wet clay,
Suffocating and afraid
That it will still be the same even when I wake up
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