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Feelin like I can get out of  this hole,
Feeling on top of the world,
shutout my self hatred,
My lack of will power; you diminish
Without you in my system,
Depression and anxiety;
Lame things that  interfere in being who I want to be;
When your run out lord help me

as

Dark eyes; seductive stare,
Make me so ***** that I can't bare
Caress your crotch,
Tease you so nonchalant,
In public;
Your seduction holds a spell on me,
attraction so deep,
Inside & out you make me complete.,
Soul as **** as your demeanor,
My sexuality couldn't be even more satisfied;  those big brown eyes, when they glance at me I become mesmerized
They man of my dreams,    
So witty and slightly mean,
your guidance lifts me from my knees,
Leave all the substance abuse in the past,
Life is finally good in havinga  blast

Wild flowers,
Water fall stream,
Misty mountains far along the breeze,
My dreams; so serene
downriver,
Filthy place where I stay,
Could go on & on, though too tired to explain;
I want to go far far away,
My dreams that my heart yearns to stay;
So close; but so far away
Pushing through everyday,
Depression poems are not my forte,
Though it's about to evolve to one now anyway,
You see no drive is an interference;
To not stay where I am today,
To my dream that I want to lay,
In a field of wildflowers; who needs a bouquet?
We all have dreams,
This is mine,
Conquered on the Devils time

Turning eighteen,
Suppose to be an adult;
feeling like a tween
  ex sad careless teen,
In the present not where I'm suppose to be,
grief of a loser,
Caught in the in between;
self inflicted headshot,
Or being who I want to be