See, I don’t want to be loved, do I?
Because if I am loved
There are expectations on me
I have to at least try to be worthy of it
But the darkness is calling my name
And it calls so sweetly
It’s made me promises
Of which I’m sure it can’t fulfill
But it’s so exciting
New and thrilling
To try
However,
As long as I’m loved
I have to show restraint
So watch me push you all away
So you’ll just let me drown myself
In my own blissful irresponsibility

Trapped
Muddy doors shut
Alligator mess nipping
Confined dirt bubble
Air taint
B.O.
Stale fries
****-tox-icity
Sanitizer plans
Stabber-jibber-jabber
You expect a tip
We have different tips in mind
Spicy no-star-to-go
Uber sad


© 2019 MJL

And…it’s here. A future. Agile? I was not enough to be.

Black in it’s entirety. A new beginning and a new ending.

Clockwork. As though a plan hatched by some supreme being.

Dear dog, which came first? Was it the white or the black?

Either way, it effortlessly taints your profoundly glorious genes.

**** this! Atrocious. Drugs?!

Goodness me. How did we get to this?

Horrible, dehumanising, and it’s here to stay.

“Suppresses”. But really only in the mildest of ways.

As if to constantly remind you of the control you once had.

Now ceded in it’s entirety to a tad bit of fad.

Desiring mumurations, or solitude
What an absolute
Such a possible, impossible truth
Now beyond the age of youth

With the sounds of the inaudible
Crossing obstacles
The road;  horrible
Can our souls be bondable?

Times passed; not wanting to be regretted
From this sight; don't want to forget
The battle; don't want to conquest
This life; many things to confess

Head in the clouds, my feet on the ground
I hear sounds: your voice, astounds
I doubt I can turn my life around
Life: a merry go round

Just take it slow,
Feeling my head on the pillow
Life takes me round and round like a merry go
Here's to you, cheers, one more go

How it must feel
To be a traitor
To everyone who's loved you

Does he know what we did?
Would he still love you?

Call me disgusting
A  horrible person
Manipulative even

I hope he learns
And that he leaves
So you are alone

And I hope you know my pain

Dignified
A generic question
You're all right
Stop this misdirection

So defined
Now that the past is over
The simplest mistakes
About to ******* over

Nothing's real
What's the strength of reason
You aren't real
There's nothing left to ground you

So ill defined in your heinous head start
Ill fitting precedence, tear me apart
Providence save me, i need your autonomy
I need your everything, what will you save for me

Take what is mine, a good enough start
Betting it all on this myopic part
I don't need your foresight
Don't need your "told you so"
All I can hope for
In this, just my clarity

I need a fix
My blade
It's my only comfort
Music is the only one
That understands
Everyone says they do
But when are they there?
I'm hidden from everyone
Who would come looking for me
If I ran?
Ran from everything
I know where I would go
I know how
It would be easy
Who would risk everything
Just to find me?
Would anyone even care?
I wanna run
Anywhere but here
If someone cares they'll find me