In this drafty bedside cavern
I lay with my feet up against the wall
tap tap tap
Held up over my hard head
Resting against the hard ground
Back here, where my pillow is my headstone
This palace is a burden,
Utterly insufferably forgiving.

Fantasy hits the ceiling
A dream shot from my mind
CRACK
Moonlight shines through the cave's newborn fissures
Useless to me
Uselessly groveling under shadowy sheets of sky  
I need this sterile fluorescent light.

It dances across my face
pitter patter pitter patter
It drops into my eyes,
Falls into the chasm between my lips
Cold and reeking of rot
Cold and tasting of an invasive species of mildew
I swallow, choking back tears
I eat it
It eats back.

I am warm in his arms,
Though no heart he bares.
Full of light and love
From soft little hairs.
No words he can speak
Yet so caring and sweet.
His forever smile
Brings purpose to me.

When times may arise
With doubt and fear,

One moment I carry is the cuddle of a bear.

I'm comfortable down here,
I rest easy down here, for here is the bottom.

Nestled tightly against my bottom is the bottom.
There is no way down so things cannot get worse.

Up there is hope. Hope CAN be poison.
Why would you want to taste poison?

Down here is comfort. Comfort IS home.
Why wouldn't you want to be at home?

Warm, safe, reachable

a bright moon lights up the room
soft linen comforting curiosity
ethereal melodies navigating forward
eyes recognizing constellations
connections beyond reality
towards everlasting ideas
then once those eyes close
those ideas will light the way

a shimmering lightness
of white rolls playfully
across the tips of
slender bladed greenery
the delicate dancing of
that yet-to-be-mown grass
grown long beyond
what building aesthetics
          should permit
a gentle play of
low-lying sun
glanced upon frosted
and thawed alike
the cold breath of wind
ruminating between
a delicate breeze or
          those chilling gusts
harsh yet homely
while blanketed in
the warmth of
this merino wool
even the bitterest of
winter mornings will
feel nothing but
picturesque

My love,
I built a house for you.
A sacred comfort,
A room for two.

Your woes and troubles,
Are mine to soothe.
The path you face
I will walk too.

And when I do,
I shall guide you home.
In the arms of mine,

You are never alone.

My dog
Can’t ever
Lay down properly.
He finds a spot
Only to leave it
And run in circles
Because nowhere ever feels
Comfortable enough.

I can’t ever
Love properly.
I find a person
Only to leave them
And run in circles
Because no one ever feels
Comfortable enough.