Everybody wants an easy fix
before it gets too late
so I invented the Duct Tape Slimming Patch
for those who wanna lose weight

This miracle of science
is available online
And in those "As seen on TV" shops
for just $19.99

It's guaranteed to work
from the north down to the south
just take your Duct Tape Slimming Patch
and stick it over your mouth