i cannot say what's on my mind,
it wont make any sense
to you,
to anyone,
and especially to me, so
i won't say anything
and you will tell me that it doesn't matter how i say it, it only matters if i do
but when you say nothing instead of ‘im in love with you’ the words will swim down the veins of your lover like poison filling them to the brink of extinction and you will regret it,
so next time think of what to say
and say it or
trust me
it will change the whole game
and thats what happened
the game was changed when nothing came out of my mouth the day you told me i was your universe,
i instantly regret not saying anything,
regret falling like a fruit from a tree that i cannot pick up with my sensitive hands
but trust me
trust me when i say i wanted to pick them up,
with every inch of me, i wanted to be the one that gave you the fruit you ever so desired but i cannot hurt my myself to please you even though pleasing you was the only thing i had ever known
i will not destroy myself, for you, but at the same time i wanted to if it meant keeping you with me
all i wanted was to be there for you but i guess the poison i filled you up with was actually a magnet i had placed in your heart
and you were not attracted to me,
you did not come when i had told you that i picked up the fruit,
my hands bleeding for you
i would give every inch of my being to say ‘im in love with you’ instead of staying quiet
because quiet didnt get me anywhere but here
****** hands, self destruction,
in the sidewalk of you heart catching a ride to god knows where,
my love for you packed in the bags i have,
waiting for a ride that will come soon.