i cannot make myself say why I like you
& trust me i've tried
a blank piece of paper
and yet i can produce no words

so why do the tears come at night?
and at school?
do you remember on the bus, you sat behind me
you drifted peacefully off to sleep
and your face was so calm and pure
i literally cried

i'm not sure i could ever let you know how much i like you
when i cannot even put it into words myself
perhaps it is because you are the first boy to ever make me feel like a pretty girl

one day i'll tell you how many times i've cried over you

brisk october air sneaks through my cracked car window,
tracing its path, tickling my neck and brushing my hair behind my ear

you're tapping your fingers on the steering wheel along to the beat
my favorite song
and when the chorus strikes, you glance over at me, grinning, completing me.
                    
                 i can't remember the last time i was this happy

we get to party, arms entangled on my hips as we stroll in
i am consumed in you so entirely
i am yours

i'm not sure where it fell apart
i think about it a lot
how thoughts can be become daggers
and happy memories machine guns
my heart beats so hard it could explode
and my fingers tingle and ache
missing your touch? your hands?
i'm not sure how to tell them that it isn't coming back

i say your name
in my sleep
you are the only one
i have ever dreamed of

and when you’re gone
far away
i just think about better days
when you held my face in your hand
you just understand

it is you, my heart demands
should there ever come a day
when you no longer feel this way
although i will feel very blue
i could never stop adoring you.

i say your name
in my sleep
because you are the only one
i've ever dreamed of

everything


that's it thats the whole poem

when my world shattered in front of me
& i could not control the shaking
or the cascade of hot tears

when i could not summon the strength
to call out your name,
but i thought you might turn around

when you walked away
as i needed you most
i knew i meant nothing to you

i called you from the home phone
just to hear your voice

your sweet, sweet voice
that once said you loved me
oh how I  miss