when is it my turn?
I'm always waiting
staring at the stars
like they're staring back
but they're aimed
at anyone else
but me
I'm the brightest in the room
but the darkest soul
and nobody listens
to me scream
in this world of people
noticeable but unnoticed
by anyone with a mind
so I'll keep waiting
for it to be my turn
if it ever comes at all.

lonely girl
loved by no one
but small metal pieces
and the knowledge of her own disgrace

lonely life
lead by the dark path
set before her by an even darker mind
and an equally as dark past

lonely heart
shattered and repaired many times before
hanging by the thinnest of threads
frayed and seconds from breaking

lonely eyes
happy but hopeless
with a nice hint of depression
buried deep inside

lonely girl
forever loved by no one
but those small, metal pieces
and the truth of her own disgrace.

do you miss me?
will you miss me at all?
because my body is withering
almost as quickly as my willpower
my heart is slowly darkening
death slowly runs along my spine
seducing me with its grim smile
I'm giving in
because anything is better than this
death seems so lovely
and six feet under
has a much better view of the world
than living above ground
and seeing smiles of people
that I know will never love me
so I'll slip away
and give in to my dark lover
falling down into a grave
will you miss me at all?

I felt it
creeping through my fog
white and shining
treading the light
kicking away the gray
nipping at my toes
but I couldn't stop the black
from tickling its fingers
up my spine
funny, how such
simple words
can turn this lovely white mist
into a deep
black
hole.
and now
I'm walking on ink
staining not only
my heels
but my worn out
heart
how could I believe
that something could really
go perfectly?
I was treading the light
but now I'm drowning
in darkness.

I wish I could believe
that love exists for me
but then I remember
all I read in my books
is just ink on a page
and a thought in my brain
praying that it could be real for me,
but the World continues
to show me fantasy
is just that; a fantasy, a dream
but I'll keep looking
for my storybook prince
dark eyes, dark mind
that brings light to my equally dark soul
and reminds me
that magic may truly exist
in this messed up world of ours
and just maybe
ill finally believe
that love exists for me.