Red bean bun and meat bun you always share
With me when we were young
When we sat at the sidewalks and
Watched the world passed us by
Talking different things under the sun.

Red bean bun and meat bun you lovingly gave
To me when you prepared to leave town
When from seedling you you grew into a tree
Testing your wings to fly like a bird
Wanting to see the whole universe.

Red bean bun and meat bun now you shared
With me when you came back home
When my heart fluttered to welcome you
At the same time crying when you found her
Realizing that you only treat me like a lil sister.

Nobody told me
The fear of losing
For loving someone so hard
Was something so harsh

Deeply and undoubtedly
Smiling with tears
With hopes you look at me
Right into my eyes

Wounded and scared
I want your comfort
But you belong to her
To non of my presence

I've should known better
Not to play with fire.
It burns, hurt and scars
So why am i addicted ?

We talked about fun
A night of one and one
Two adults out dating
Not a lady-in-waiting.
Two people holding hands,
We didn’t have any plans
Not saying words like never
And always and forever.

It’s an unwritten verbal contract
With just the one signature.
The expectancy of longevity
Is more than a bit premature.
It is important to recognize it
When it’s all about fun and games.
It keeps temperature from rising
And avoids the calling of names.

Then it all got turned around
And quite suddenly I found
There were rules for me to obey
Like staying out too late in the day
And things I had to do with you
If I wanted to demonstrate I was true.
It was no longer important to you
It was not enough just loving you.

It’s an unwritten verbal contract
With just the one signature.
The expectancy of longevity
Is more than a bit premature.

I am a prisoner in your heart
When did my sentence start?
How long will I have to serve?
How did you get the nerve
To change a delightful love affair
Into something that would scare?
Sorry, I have to call a halt
You know it’s all your fault.

It is important to recognize it
When it’s all about fun and games.
It keeps temperature from rising
And avoids the calling of names.

We only had a few short dates
We barely made it to third base
And yet the thing is totally shattered.
You’re out looking at china patterns.
There were no promises ever made.
I do not mean to be throwing shade
But this is not the thing I agreed upon
Whatever we once had is now gone.

It’s an unwritten verbal contract
With just the one signature.
The expectancy of longevity
Is more than a bit premature.
It is important to recognize it
When it’s all about fun and games.
It keeps temperature from rising
And avoids the calling of names.

Pretending a day is forever
Then watching you hurry away
It’s a game we play together
We are strangers in the light of day.
I’ve learned to lie with my eyes
To act like we never were lovers
When I am nobody you ever claim
We won’t walk in sunshine together.

The love of my life is a stranger
And this is the price I have paid
I smile when my heart is a wasteland
And, my life is a dance masquerade.
I’m dancing with a shadow
It looks so very real.
It moves with the rhythm
It does everything but feel.

I can only get so much reward
From rewriting each scene
From what it really was today
To what it might have been.
I am settling for a fantasy
Of what love is really about.
Picking up the scraps of dreams
That anyone else would throw out.

The love of my life is a stranger
And this is the price I have paid
I smile when my heart is a wasteland
And, my life is a dance masquerade.
I’m dancing with a shadow
It looks so very real.
It moves with the rhythm
It does everything but feel.

You weren’t listening to me
I know it to be true you see
Because you could not hear me
And not be in love with me.
I have told you carefully
What you have here in me
A person of total loyalty
And outrageous personality.

You could not have been listening
Because you were not hearing
The wonderful things I’m telling
And the joys that are here waiting
Waiting patiently and languishing
In the shadow of your evening
As the sun has begun lowering
And the moon has begun rising.

I sit in the shadows and I’m sad
Missing all the good times we had
Knowing something cannot be bad
When it has made me so very glad.
If you only missed me just a tad
I would be a much happier lad.
I fear our love was just a fad
And it’s serving to drive me mad.

I know you weren’t listening to me
Or you couldn’t behave callously.
You would be enchanted totally
And drawn to me quite helplessly.
Is it something else completely?
Some magic spell not from me?
Some disgusting magical sorcery
That drags you away forcefully?

sleep has become a boring chore,
another thing I would rather not do.
I'd rather have the moonlight rap me in his dainty arms,
then feel the cold lack of presence.
but that too is long a distance,
far, out of sight in plain view.
we may claim to be a strong,
but the arms of another melt soul into stillness,
the stillness of a lake perfect for skipping stones.
my heart craves a partner for the dance of the bed,
***, no.
for love, a much slower dance.
for the soft touch of our noses,
the shallow breath on our flesh,
our eyes,
will devour us whole,
and that's quite alright.
for when your skin is so soft and you slip through my arms and melt into my chest,
I will be so happy.
I will finally sleep,
knowing I will see you in the morning.

There's not quite a face like yours
No one else but me adores
Mapped out, pinned inside my head
Still think of you when I lay in bed

I asked if we could get a picture
You obliged and said, "Okay, sure,"
Your braces cyan at that time
Wished right then that you'd be mine

Then you left and went to places
Red was the color of your braces
Last time, you got to Singapore
Back home I rotted to the core

Saw you then not too long after
Give or take just one year later
Turned my head back, saw your smile
Happiest I've felt in a while

I just want for him notice me
That i'm here
I exist
I breath
My eyes is set only towards him
Even though
He doesn't even see me

Un-Xplained… by Nirvana



How it feels
                                     When we have telephone
But we can't talk

How it feels
When we have number
But we can't contact

How it feels
  When we are near
But still apart

How it feels
              When we are desperate
But no guts to confront

How it feels
When we can be in touch
But no  such permissions....