the tune had been haunting
london for weeks past,
but when the lights went out,
they went out fast.

none of us thought
those days would end.
the music would always be there
anytime we needed a friend.

the sweetness of the soprano;
sprinkled over a sultry saxophone;
the steady heartbeat of an upright bass;
titillating trumpets tooting a tune.

the raven-haired lady: the envy of the room;
the men could only dream
of being so lucky.
the ladies could only scream,
hoping to catch the tall dark stranger's eye.
at the end of the night,
we all sang a whiskey lullaby.

but the wind blew cold-
it made us shiver.
the band packed up their magic.
the soprano ran off with the tall dark stranger.
all alone and without home,
the raven-haired lady blew her mind out,
nowhere left to roam.

nights became weeks and weeks became months.
our throats were perpetually plugged with lumps.
it's hard to say how meaningful it can be-
the touch something can have,
no matter how seemingly arbitrary-
until it is gone with the wind.

sometimes i feel too much
sometimes i feel too little
i wish i could stay in that happy place
that lies right in the middle

when i feel too much
it's a torrent of emotion
a downpour of epic proportion
and i pray for it to end

yet when it does i don't feel enough
i'm numb, frozen, depressed.
I then pray for this to end
and i'd do anything to feel again

so i'm stuck in this happy limbo
never feeling quite right
like goldilocks in the three bear's house
i can't sleep at night

read this slowly
in the intent to feel as though
your big toe stands on top of the highest peak
and attempt to spin
sweeping the air
and you are allowed to smile as wide as the sky above
and you may grasp the blades that make your shoulders
feeling safe,
you might feel alone.

they say that we're not unique
like we think we are
and perhaps that is true
but i'm not joking when i say
that there is no one else like you-
or rather, there was no one else like you

everything about you stood out
from your smile that reached
from corner to corner of your cheek
eyes dark as night yet sparkled so bright
long hair of ebony-colored silk
and the most genuine laugh
anyone has ever heard

there is a face missing in the hall
they all think i don't notice at all
but they don't know the truth
my heart aches for you
how i regret what was
how i mourn what could have been
how i can't quite comprehend
that this is your end

your name rhymes with your age
both imprinted on my brain, a permanent tattoo-
seventeen
forever seventeen and gone too soon
your future stolen from you
by what you felt you had to do

they say that everyone loves you
when you're six foot in the ground
but in your case, that's not true-
everyone loves you, period
sometimes words aren't enough
but i hope you know, wherever you are
i hope you gather up our love
and take it with you when you fly away
soaring high above us all

fly away, sweet creature
find the peace that you yearned for
on earth in the good place
find everything that you deserved
and much, much more
i wish you nothing but happiness
i'm only sorry you couldn't find it here

we all hold you near our hearts
so it's okay if you fly away
goodbye, angel-
it will be a while
before any of us see you again
but i know we will all
be together again someday
when we too meet our end

left brain, left brain
logical and literal
logarithms and lessons
long nights with little light
left brain sees the one
we love
and stays away
because it's the right thing to do

right brain, right brain
romantic and ridiculous
poetry and promises
dreams and darlings
yet to be killed
right brain sees the one
we love
and shrivels up dead
because being so close and so far
is too much for one to bear
when your heart is impaired

left brain, left brain
sees sights of soaring smiles
sees sights of somber sorrow
and squashes it with seas of cynicism
because left brain knows better
those people hurt us before-
why let them hurt us some more?

right brain, right brain
silly and sentimental
attaches arbitrary attributes
to objects of ominous obeisance
because right brain is impulsive
in this moment, they are everything
so they will always be everything-
right?

left brain, right brain
dynamic dichotomy
different and drastic
secure and stubborn
too strong-willed to back down
too lonely to break apart
disagree as we may
we know we might as well stay
for everyone in life needs a friend
and left brain and right brain
will be together until the end