The ache in my chest
Tears in my eyes
All my joy is durresed
Why is it a suprise?
You didn't try
You didn't fight
Your the reason I cry
All through the night
Why is it a suprise?
Blood on my wrists
Heaviness on my soul
My story you put in a twist
I'm losing my self control
Why is it a suprise?
Rope on my neck
Tears on my face
Now you want me back
Wasn't I your disgrace
Why is it a suprise?
Now there's an ache in your chest
There's tears in your eyes
I was trying my best
I was your blessing in disguise
But why are you suprised?

You held my hand
But know your letting go
You took your final stand
Now it's the end of the show
Your final breath
Spoke my name
But you didn't say the rest
And things will never be the same
Without you here
It feels so strange
Not able to pull you near
As you take me in an embrace
You died a fighter
And I'll always be proud
But even in my nightmares
It's you who I see in the crowd

The words you have said,
The things you have done,
Have all burned to ashes,
I hope you've had your fun.
The hearts you have broken
The tears that have fallen
I wish were to be left alone
But they're all but forgotten
The knives in my heart
The blood on my wrists
Has written my apology
But I know I won't be missed
The love I felt
The joy in my heart
Has all been mistaken
For something that tore me apart

How did I not know
That you were letting me go
Piece by piece
Tearing at my soul
When you pushed
I pulled
But that was my mistake
Because by you I was fooled
And there's nothing left to say
It's not worth the tears
When the laughter is free
By you I feel ******
For all of eternity

Beat one beat two
My eyes look into you
Beat three beat four
Your walking out the door
Beat five beat six
The blood leaks out of my skin
Beat seven beat eight
Oh no it's too late
The beat of your heart matching mine
Has turned into a flat line

I wish I didn't feel
I wish I didn't think
My intelligence is a curse
My heart begins to sink

I wish I couldn't love
I wish my heart was cold
My words are locked up
A story that's untold

I wish I didnt care
I wish I didn't scream
My nights are filled with terror
A misery filling my dreams

I still love
I Still feel
I still think but I wish it was real

I still care
I still scream
My heart is still warm
I so badly want to be unseen
My tears only wash away
So much to hide the pain

I keep it in so you don't see
The storm that's inside of me

In my dreams
I wait for happiness to approach
For someone to save me from this dismal corner of my mind
Where the sun is cold and the years scorch my face
The scarce amount of peace in my bones
Leaks through my skin
Leaving me as nothing
No matter how far I stumble
I can't seem to fall away
From his clammy grasp
A war that I will never win
The trees grow taller as much as my timid personality
Towers over my dead-and-gone self confidence
Someone please save me from this inundating despair
Even in my nomadic mind
I still revolve around a deep melancholy
Not even all the therapists in the world could catch me
My dream is a reflection
      Of the storm in my eyes